My Thoughts on an Unaddressed Pressure of Popular or Trend Culture
As long as we’ve walked this planet there have been trends. Things that are more popular, the more widely accepted way of doing things. Inherently this means that there are things that are excluded from that group. At some point, we began to manipulate this concept to create division amongst ourselves. Some magical being behind a curtain decides whether the trend is a good trend or not and who is allowed to follow that trend. We currently exist in a time that has a highly evolved Trend Culture. Entire businesses, careers, technological advancements, are founded upon the fact that our culture, in particular, American culture, is about what is popular. But my issue is not with popular culture or its fleeting nature.
The problem with trends and trend culture, having things be “in” and “now” is that there is no way to satisfy the pressures created by it. You must choose a narrative, right? It’s the only way. You either follow the trend or you don’t. But even that decision is a trap. Follow the trend and some will say you’re unoriginal, you lack imagination, you’re a follower. Don’t follow the trend and others will say you’re trying too hard, your intentional counterculture attitude in itself is even a trend! It’s a cyclical hell that you will lose years being engulfed by. There’s only one way to escape this labyrinth, don’t think. Don’t think about whether something is in or isn’t, whether it’s too trendy or not. If you like it, do it. If you like it, wear it. There’s a freedom in existing for you.
The thing about it is, as long as you don’t infringe on the freedoms of others, you are free to do what you want. The beauty in that lies in the fact that you will, in fact, realize that the opinions of others hold no significance in your actual existence. This doesn’t mean that you don’t cherish the opinions of some or give them weight. This doesn’t mean you don’t care for others or are loyal to others. This means, at the end of each day, no matter who you love, who you hang around, each decision you made was your own. So, did it satisfy you, did it make you happy? If you happened to fall in line with popular culture or the counterculture, let it be. It’s insignificant.
I know it’s much harder to implement these things than it is to spew the words at you but I want everyone to bask in the emotions that come with liberating yourself in this way. I used to hide my interests, music I liked, etc because I didn’t want to allow my persona to be tainted. We curate ourselves so much, making sure to only show the world what fits into our created persona. The fact of the matter is, I would never get the response I was looking for. I would express interest in said artists and someone would say they are overrated or too mainstream. In turn, I would delve into an underworld seeking out the most obscure artist I could find. All I would return with is some mediocre music and no one to discuss them with because only three people in the world even knew they existed! I felt ostracized and more importantly, I felt unfulfilled. When I would express that I like someone who wasn’t well known, I would receive notice that I was either strange or trying too hard to be counter.
There is no pleasing everyone because we all exist as manifestations of our own preferences, thoughts, and experiences. You will always find opposition and the fact of the matter is that it does nothing but frustrate you. We are both doomed and fortunate to be a bunch of individuals with a lot in common. Because of this, you will rarely be alone in an interest, desire, feeling, etc. Someone out there will share this with you. But we are also a creation of our own experiences, so not everyone will share this with you. There is no right choice when it comes to music, fashion, books, etc.
Why does changing your attitude even matter, you ask?
I think it is also important to learn this so that we don’t fall victim to being the person passing judgment. The same way you enjoy dressing trendy or listening to a popular artist or you don’t enjoy a particular style or artist, everyone does. I’ve learned that once I started enjoying the things I enjoy for me, I was able to look at others objectively. It is indoctrinated in us, especially young women, to judge others. “What is she wearing?” “Why would she do her hair like that?” All too familiar. Once I began to do things for myself, I was able to answer those questions much easier, “Because she wants to and it has no bearing on your life in any way. Move along.” Eventually, I realized those questions decreased in frequency. I don’t find myself thinking these things as naturally as I did before.
I guess these ramblings are just one person wanting to share how much lighter and content I feel. It’s something that comes with time and practice, and I’m still learning, still catching myself. But, I must say it feels damn good to look at something and not wonder whether it’s right or wrong or what people will say, but instead to ask myself yes or no? Do you like it or not?
Just give it some thought. Or don’t.