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Let me tell how my year began. I deal with several mental and physical illnesses, some that are more under control than others right now. Not feeling well is already a huge hurdle to try and get over in terms of maintaining good mental health. When you don’t feel well it’s so easy to go down the slippery slide that can lead to anxiety attacks and or depression. At the beginning of the year, I had several health concerns already in progress but I was handling them okay. I had a vacation to Mexico planned for later in the month which was serving, somewhat, as a beacon of hope.
Then, the day before my husband and I left for our vacation, our apartment building caught fire. I was home and got out safely, but it was nerve-wracking nonetheless. We came home that night to some slight water damage but virtually everything still intact. We cleaned up as much as we could and headed for our vacation. When we got back from vacation, life virtually flipped upside down. My health problems escalated on several fronts and we came home to a notice telling us that we had two weeks to find somewhere else to live. Yeah, two weeks to vacate the premises because the water damage to the building necessitated that around 150 people vacate the building for repairs.
In the next two weeks, I would move us to a temporary location(while my husband had all of two days off from work), undergo three medical procedures, and be scheduled for surgery. The week after that madness I underwent surgery to get my gallbladder removed. February, ironically, felt like the longest month. Even as I write this I’m honestly surprised I didn’t slip. One small anxiety attack and several typical and understandable frustrations later, I’m finally getting back some sense of normalcy.
In the past, this would not have been the case for me. Too many stresses at once are triggers for most people with mental health issues. But, I was determined to push through this as unscathed as possible. So how did I do this? This is NOT the part where I tell you to take a bath, or a walk or do yoga. Those are all wonderful things for maintaining good mental health. For some of you they may work wonders and if that is so, continue to make time for those things. I enjoy those things also but in high-stress times they just aren’t enough. These are the 5 things I consistently did to make sure my mental health remained in a good place during this stressful time. Please note, this does not replace proper treatment from a mental health professional and are only meant to supplement proper treatment during stressful times.
1. Take a moment, every single day to put things back into perspective
Whether it is 10 minutes or 30 minutes, take some time without any distractions or external stimuli and just be present in the moment. Use this time to remember that while things are difficult, you’ve probably been through difficult things before. And if you haven’t, even if this is the hardest things you’ve ever gone through in your life, it simply cannot last forever and you are so much stronger than you think. So, take a moment, every single day to remind yourself of that. I don’t care if you don’t really believe it at first, taking that time will allow you to see it come true.
2. Acknowledge the difficulty of the situation you are going through, don’t dismiss it.
Please, whatever you do, do not brush off your struggles as insignificant or “not that bad”. If something affects you negatively, whether it is physically or mentally, it deserves the same amount of energy and effort as everything else you do to take care of yourself. Also, don’t compare your struggles. Struggles are relative. Never think because something “worse” or “more difficult” has happened to someone else or even to you, that this individual situation doesn’t warrant its own respect and attention. Trust me, I get it. Some of us just always want to be the toughest cookie in the box. However, acknowledging that things are hard, is tough and badass and nothing can take that away from you. Every single struggle you go through is valid and there is no prize for “worst” struggle. So, allow yourself to acknowledge it so that your mental health does not suffer.
3. Have someone to talk to
Some things are just easier when you can complain about them, when you can say them out loud, allow yourself to whine and be pissed and then keep it moving. It’s even better when you can complain and someone can offer you comfort or a perspective you may have failed to see before. I highly suggest finding someone to talk to. This can be a friend or family member but sometimes you just need an objective listener with no opinions or no sweet talk. Someone who isn’t going to, “It’s going to be alright!” you the entire time you’re trying to be annoyed and work through some things. This is why I highly suggest something like BetterHelp. BetterHelp is affordable and private, online counseling that is available to everyone. The counselors are certified professionals and you simply pay a small fee to have access to them whenever and however you want. This means video chat, email, even text message. Professional counseling from your couch. You can even try it out with a free seven-day trial to see if it works for you. If you’re anything like me, this is perfect. I don’t have to traverse traffic, wait in an office, or any of the other inconveniences that come along with talking to someone. You can find out more here. Either way, find someone you can unload everything onto, it’s therapeutic, to say the least.
4. Also, take time to be alone and have an outlet.
This is the time for that long bath or yoga, but the key here is to be alone. I know, it seems counterintuitive and you don’t need to be sulking alone for long periods of time ( be mindful of that) but sometimes the constant noise, motion, and presence of other people can be weighing you down and you don’t even realize it. So, maybe it’s the time you set out to put things in perspective or maybe it’s an extra long bath with your headphones in but whatever it may be, take time to get away from the actual stresses. They, unfortunately, will be there when you get back, so whats 30 mins or an hour to yourself.
Your brain and body need this. Stress will wear you down physically and mentally. You need to take time to center yourself without anyone else’s opinions or suggestions or “helpfulness” wearing you down even more. So, if life is getting out of hand, step away for a second. If you’re religious, use that. If meditation or yoga works for you, use that. Write, scream, dance, whatever but have some time to yourself where there are no expectations or obligations of you.
5. Take your medicine
Please, please, please, if you’re on medication, do not let the chaoses and stresses of life allow you to stop taking care of yourself and taking your medication. It’s actually really simple, it will only make things worse, and make you feel worse and that should be the lease of your concerns.
These are the things that allowed me to stay centered and not spiral out of control. Try them out, keep what works, toss what doesn’t. There is no right way to do this, as long as you’re being healthy and responsible. My goal is to share what worked for me so that, hopefully, you can find something that helps you also. I cannot stress, however, how much these do not replace proper treatment and taking your medication. These are boosters, extras, whatever you want to call them. Proper treatment from a mental health professional will always be your best option.
I’ve also created a small infographic that can be printed if you’d like to place these tips somewhere as a reminder. It can be accessed by joining our newsletter family below. *I will not spam your email, I promise!*
Take care of yourself!
